5 Non-Resolutions for the New Year

http://wp.me/p1d7d0-9Y6 5 non-resolutions to make this year

As we face a new year with a fresh, clean slate, I find myself thinking about what resolutions I want to make for 2017. While many of us commit to making new year’s resolutions such as losing weight, getting organized and spending less, only 8% of people achieve their new year’s resolutions, with about one-fourth of those quitting within the first week. I’ve been reflecting on my previous year’s resolutions, along with my successes and failures, and I’ve decided to re-think how I plan my resolutions for year. That being said, these are the five resolutions I won’t be making.

1. I will not lose weight while sacrificing my health. I believe it’s always good to focus on bettering my physical health, yet I refuse to fall in to the trap of “skinny is happy.” Instead of judging my success by the number on the scale, I will focus my goals toward my quality of life and overall health. Yes, I will take the time to work out and eat healthy, but also to set aside time to focus on me and my mental health. I am determined this year to take a balanced approach to fitness and diet. Gone are the days of crying over five more pounds, killing myself for just a few more burpees or comparing myself to the women in magazines. I am going to take care of my body, fuel it with what helps it run best (and it’s OK if that happens to be full-fat dairy or carbs!) and love myself along the journey.

2. I will not save money at the expense of neglecting generosity. I tend to fall into the “saver” category when it comes to personal finances. Yet I am learning there can be such thing as too much of a saver — it’s called stingy. While I want to save money in order to support my family, I also want to use my hard-earned dollars to enhance others’ lives. If this means going a little over budget a few times in order to help a family in need, support a non-profit or treat friends to a gift that truly want on their special day, that is ok! I would hate to get to the end of my life with money saved but without the satisfaction of knowing I made a difference through giving.

3. I will not organize my life without giving myself some room for mess. Mainly, I refuse to stress out over having the perfect house. As a self-proclaimed neat freak, this will be a hard one for me. However, the question I will be asking myself this year when it comes to my home and my belongings will be: “Is my house welcoming — do people feel comfortable when they are in it?” and “Do these things contribute to my quality of life?” If people are over for a dinner party and having a good time, there’s no need to focus on if the kitchen is perfectly organized or if the living room is pristine. The memories being made are much more rewarding.

4. I will not commit to learning a new skill that does not bring me joy. Instead I will focus on sharpening the skills I do have and putting them to meaningful use. In years past I have laser-focused on learning an out-of-the-blue skill (mainly one that was popular among friends or co-workers), only to be completely down on myself when I was unable to master it. I’ve come to the realization that I will most likely never run a marathon nor learn three languages. Instead, I will focus on the things I love and ways to improve them, such as writing, cooking and taking photographs. I’d rather spend time improving upon skills that give my life, and hopefully others, true meaning.

5. I will not attempt to be all things to all people. We all know as military spouses that there is a temptation to “do all the things!” I’ve found myself attempting such a feat in the past and it is beyond exhausting. With my career and now, a new baby, I’m unable to make every coffee or spouse social. I can’t be at every squadron event or volunteer regularly with special programs. However, I will happily be there when I can, and when I can be fully present in that moment. It’s not worth being at everything if I’m spreading myself too thin.

I am excited to greet a new year with new opportunity, yet I am committing to focusing on what truly matters! Tell us in the comments what resolutions or non-resolutions are you making this year. Cheers to 2017!

About the Author

Lizanne Carlson
Lizanne is an attorney and freelance writer. She is married to an Air Force pilot and they are expecting her first child in November. Lizanne is an active member of the Military Spouse J.D. Network and was recently featured in Task & Purposefor her human interest work in the legal field. She cares deeply for issues surrounding children and families. In her freetime she enjoys cooking and traveling. Follow her on Twitter @theblawgyall.