Putting Away The Coffee Pot

cupboard full of coffee pots

As I clean my kitchen this morning, I need to clean the coffee pot and put it in the cupboard.  It lives in the cupboard when my husband is gone because I don’t drink coffee, we don’t have nearly enough counter space, and I really like to have empty counters.

The moving of the coffee pot has become a symbol of my mental transition from “with spouse” to “without spouse.”  If he’s only gone a day or two, I don’t bother.  Three or more days, it will probably be put away at some point.  It isn’t as if I’m thinking, “Well, I’m glad you are gone so I can get this coffee pot off of my counter.”  In fact, it is exactly the opposite.  I like having the coffee pot out because it means that there was a coffee drinker in my house that morning.

Most military spouses have developed some sort of routines that are different when their spouse is gone.  Some people stock up on military-themed movies, some people do all their husband’s laundry.  I tend to make up some crazy scheme to get thin, smart and rich.  Oh, and turn my children in to model citizens.  And decorate.

Some day in the future, I’m going to have a house with a sensible spot for the coffee maker and absolutely no reason to ever put it away.  Should work out well, since the coffee drinker should be waking up in that house more often than he does now.  In the meantime, time to run some vinegar and give Mr. Coffee a good scrub.  I hope it gets to come out again soon.

About the Author

Kate Horrell
Kate Horrell is a military financial coach, mom of four teens, and Navy spouse. She has a background in taxes and mortgage banking, and a trove of experience helping other military families with their money. Follow her on twitter @realKateHorrell.
  • damselandfamily

    What a touching post… and it’s so true.

    One of the weirdest things for me was that I didn’t want to move his towel that hung next to mine in our bathroom. It seemed like it would mean he was really gone… my one lonely towel hanging there would just be too much. Even weirder? At the time, I was teaching full-time and paid a housekeeper to come in every other week to scrub the house. I told her to not move the towel. Finally, after several weeks, I washed it… but I hung it back up next to mine.

  • wifeunit

    I hope it comes back out for use soon! I am the same as the commenter above – no way do I move his towel from its spot. That would be too much of a visual reminder for me.


  • Laura

    I washed his towel, and put away all of his uniforms…and turned OFF the fans in the bedroom. When he’s home, those fans (ceiling fan and box fan on his side of the bed) run 24 hours per day. When he’s gone, they get turned off….well…I just turned them back on…but only because the treadmill now resides in the bedroom for my weight-loss scheme.

  • I do the same thing. The tell tale sign for me, though, is my to-do list is 4 pages long instead of 2.

  • Rena

    I always slept in my husband’s shirts. There were 2 that were my favorite when he was gone.

  • Guest

    I SO understand. I hate washing his towels and his laundry after he’s left, and I can’t stand to move anything that he put down somewhere. I hate my toothbrush being all alone. I hate the big, empty bed. I hate seeing his empty pillow. I ask him to try to clean up after himself before he leaves, not because I don’t want to be burdened with the clean up, but because it’s just too sad.