Drowning in Homework

Calling all moms with school-aged kids--how do you handle all this homework?!

I'm sure having a deployed spouse does not help at all, but I'm needing some encouragement, tips, strategies, ideas on how to organize, keep track of, and help the kids benefit from homework.

If you're willing to spill it, meet me after the jump.

I have two girls.  The oldest is a fifth grader and the youngest is in first.  We started at a different school this year and I'm very happy with it.  However, I've noticed that I'm having trouble handling work, housework, household things, sports and practice schedules and making sure the girls' are prepared for homework.

For instance, my youngest has a math worksheet every night.  And, this week, she began with spelling homework every night.  This work comes home on Monday and is not due until Friday.  Unfortunately for us today, we realized that we had not completed two evenings of spelling assignments (don't ask me how--I plead the Fifth) and my daughter had to write a sentence featuring each of her 10 spelling words before we left the house this morning.

I did take one positive step in employing a binder where we keeping two sections of assignments or project news.  "Ongoing" assignments like my oldest daughter's 'current events' assignment for science which happens four times throughout the year with the same instructions applying to each due date.  Then, we have a section for things going on this month only--my daughter's band concert instructions, the spelling journal instructions, Book-It forms, etc. go there.

My problem is, if I'm not seeing it, it slips my mind.  The flipside of that is, I "see" entirely too much paper and clutter if I don't corral it somewhere.  Add to that, the comprehensive information for math and other assignments on the school's website that I should be studying and committing to memory and I feel like a total slacker.

What do you do at your house?  If you homeschool, what tips can you offer those of us who don't that might help us stay organized?  I want to help the kids become self-sufficient and responsible for their things, but I'd like to do that without hollering or breaking out in a sweat on Friday because I realize we are behind on homework.  And, what do you do if your deployed spouse is the math whiz and you are definitely NOT.

I'd love to know, so please put it in comments!

Comments

[She of the Sea]

I am a big binder person. Our life is so much smoother when I keep it up to date.

I also use magnets to stick stuff to the back of the front door - it only works if you have a metal door but it is a good place for notes, permission slips, etc.

I hate to say but I have sort of given up. I can not do everything. It is their stuff, and if they forget to do it, it won't get done. It does seem to be working - even the disorganized one is learning to keep on top of her things.

[Navy spouse]

With my kids, it was a matter of sitting at the kitchen table every school night and focusing strictly on their studies. This became their daily routine that followed after-school curriculae activities, athletics, recitals, etc. I was able to oversee their studies while preparing a quick meal, or just sitting with them and reviewing their projects. It wasn't easy believe me but it was important.

To me it was about setting a founation at an early age for my kids that their studies were priority before all other activities. My kids learned very quickly that unless homework assignments were completed, outside school activities were obsolete, so they learned to juggle it all.

With both kids now away at college, my son (currently at the Naval Academy), the older of the two, has learned to micro-manage his time while my daughter (Jacksonville University) still seems to wait until the last minute to turn in assignments.

As a Navy spouse, I have been a full-time mum throughout my kids' lives and without my husband home for the most part, taught my kids that being organized and prioritizing their homework assignments in addition to extra curricula activities can be accomplished.

As a single parent for the most part of my kids' lives it is a lot to handle, but once the kids get into a regular routine, it all becomes second nature to them of what needs to be done. Continue to encourage your kids the importance of homework as their priority.

The phrase 'superwomen' comes into play as a military spouse. Somehow we learn to juggle it all but what we are teaching our kids is how to micro-manage their time effectively.

[Amber]

I have a homework table set up. It's in the baby's room simply because there are no distractions in this room for the older boys, and there was space available there.

DH put two nails in the wall, one on either side of the table. We've hung clipboards from these. My oldest uses the clipboard to hang his spelling list, which he'll use all week. My middle son uses the clipboard to hang his reading tracker, which we hand in at the end of the month. They also hang parent notes, etc. here and I check in for this stuff, rather than having them throw it on the kitchen counter where I'm sure to look past it.

They each have a calendar hanging over their study spot. To be honest, we don't use the calendar often, simply because they don't have long term projects going yet.

I let each boy use old plastic cups and arts supplies to design their own pencil cup. They also have a small basket full of scratch paper, that sits between their seats. There's a second shared basket with erasers, pencil sharpeners, lead refills for the mechanical pencils, and a box of crayons, each. My husband put a plastic cup on the table as a trash can for pencil shavings and scratch paper.

The reason for all of this stuff on the table is that there's no excuse for anyone to get up and down during homework.

EVERY piece of paper that has to go back to school goes right back into their homework folder the minute it's complete. This includes permission slips, money for field trips, picture packages paperwork, and so on.

Depending on how much homework they have each boy has a set amount of time to complete homework- on average 45 minutes. This is because I'm not going to spend 2 hours reminding them to "finish your homework". If they don't settle down and finish, they'll have to accept the consequences of not having homework to hand in. It took less than a week of enforcing this and they've gotten into the routine of just settling in and getting through it.

The boys are responsible for grabbing their folders in the morning. If they don't, they miss recess (the teacher's consequence for no homework) and they'll learn to grab things.

I had put a dry erase board on the back of the front door for morning reminders, but mostly this has turned into "Mom's reminders". LOL

I've always been an organized person but now with DH gone I'm really appreciative that this is second nature for me.

[marinebrat]

when all 4 of my kids still lived at home, I found this great calendar. It's called "Mom's Calendar" and it has 5 different columns for each day to write schedules, homework, etc. I used one column for each kid and still had room for my stuff. It's the same same as most of the wall calendars, so it stayed where everyone could see it too add things as needed. Another thing I did was color code stuff. Written in RED where the most urgent things (dr appts, dentist appt, etc.) sports schedules were green, homework was blue.

[Guard Wife]

@ marine brat -- I color code our family calendar--everyone has their own color and then I have a post-it w/any instructions or details on activities at school, etc. That way, rather than keeping the sheets regarding who to make checks out to, deadlines, etc., I have it on that replaceable post-it.

@ Amber & Navy Spouse -- I need to designate better spots for homework & make them settle in when we get home to get it done. Things have been gradually sliding with our hectic schedules & sometimes, I find myself having to make the youngest do her homework while we wait for her sister's ball practice to end--otherwise, it cuts into bath/bedtime. Crazy.

@ She -- you know I love my binders, girl. ;0)

[dizzylizzie]

our son is in 5th grade this year. ive always just made him responsible for his own homework. when he gets off the bus i ask him if he has any hw. if he does, he has to do it before he can play outside/tv etc..

if he forgets his hw the teacher just gives him a 0. too many zeros = bad report cards. bad report cards = no $

on the report card, i pay $10 per A, $5 per B, C's 0, D's he owes US $5 F's he owes US $10 (cheap and it works, he's honor roll almost every time). then i transfer the $$ into his bank acct online. he's allowed to spend half on whatever he wants, the other half has to be saved.

we've done it this way since kindergarten and its pretty much always worked for us. we dont end up micro-managing and he learns responsibility.

if he doesnt bring me permission slips for trips or whatnot he doesnt get to go. trust me, they'll only forget once. if i get letters for events that are happening THAT day or already passed that we missed(that he was supposed to give me a week ago but shoved in his desk) then we dont go.

[Marine Wife]

Sorry, I've got nothing. My 4th grader is pretty self-sufficient for the most part. But the Kindergartner... Oy! And I can't really blame her b/c after being in school for 6 hours, the last thing she wants to do is homework. Plus, it's Kindergarten, for crying out loud!

[tankerswife]

I've always told my kids that they were responsible for getting their homework done. If they didn't, then I was going to manage it for them and I promise they won't like it. So far, neither of my girls have needed me to handle it for them. The oldest is a freshmen in HS and the youngest is in 6th.

It's always been a rule that all extracurricular activities come secondary to school work. And I've always limited them to one activity at a time. Between the two of them, that's plenty. They're involved in something, but not overburdened. Besides, I truly believe they need time to just be kids...to play, goof off, go to sleepovers, etc.

[Laura]

I am NOT responsible for homework. EVER.

This year I have a kindergartener, 2nd grader, 4th grader, 6th grader, 7th grader, and a 10th grader. There is a LOT of homework in our house. I only help if there are questions...oh, but I DO supervise the Kindergartener's work.

They are are required to do homework as soon as they walk in the door from school. Each keeps track of their own work in their own folders, in binders that the teachers have set up. They walk in, sit at the dining table, and set to work. If they have questions, they ask, but I don't have to supervise much, if at all.

Seriously, if I had to do homework with them every night, I think I would probably have a mental breakdown. I can't keep up with the papers that HAVE TO be signed, never mind the stuff that they have to fill out each night.

[Jeri]

I never have figured out why they have so much homework. It seems to be growing too. Maybe it's all the extra stuff they teach now like Johnny has two mommies or it's Kwanza or green day. While that all has it's place, we want them to graduate knowing how to read and write and do math. One of my son's friends graduated from DODS and is doing remedial work in college. Get back to teaching the basics and we can go play! From a former teaching major!

[Lemon Stand]

I'm with Laura. I have a 6th, 9th, (2) 12th and a freshman in college who lives at home. With five kids I don't have time to ensure all their homework gets done.

They all have consequences for not getting it done, but ultimately they are responsible for doing it. I'm responsible for making sure they have a quiet place to do it.

[Tressa]

I am all about personal responsiblity. I homeschool 2 and have 1 in school. My older two at home know what they have to do and they do it.(Well, on an ideal day, anyway. We all have bad days.) When they were in school,getting their homework done was on their shoulders. Middle school is the perfect time to implement the personal responsiblity because a few bad grades won't affect their college applications. Instead of getting upset about their bad grades, I would ask them what they could do to ensure a better grade next time around. What better time to learn a little time management?

[Erica from Tutor.com]

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[MO]

I curse the teachers and the school districts. They take everything enjoyable and then make home just as annoying. BLAH! That's how I handle it. Can you tell I'm slightly annoyed with public schools.

[Leenie]

Oh boy Homework is like a bad word in my house these days. My first grader is still adjusting to having Daddy away, and gets sad at school a lot so not only is there the regular homework to do but additional worksheets that should have been completed at school. After weeks of trying everything under the sun, I finally just started setting the timmer and whatever we can get done in 1 hour gets done, everything else gets thrown away (after the kids go to bed) or sent back to school with a note that says: "sorry we worked on it for an hour, that's my limit for a 1st grader" And really is a bad grade in 1st grade gonna matter in the long run? I think making sure my kids have time to just be a kid and try and have a little fun as they cope with family seperation is way more important.

[Aundria]

My oldest son is done with school, but my husband and I have two young sons, and our oldest, who just turned 6, is now in kindergarten. He comes home with homework every night, unlike when my oldest or myself were in school. He does math three nights a week, and reading the other two. We have a set time for homework. He comes home, is allowed to play for an hour, and then we sit down and do the assignments. My husband is deployed alot. We are an active duty Army family, so most of this all falls on my shoulders. That time we've set up for homework is non-negotiable. Once we're done, he is given more playtime, then supper and bathtime. The system works for us. I know as he progresses in school, it will become increasingly more difficult, which is why a definitive time for homework is so important. No matter what else is going on, this is stability and he can rely on me being there helping him every night. Even when he is changing schools for the third time, this schedule does not waver. Give your child that stability and it can only help him/her grow. Their education is the one place I won't budge. The rule will stand...schoolwork first. Good luck!