Mail Takes Too Long

I'm having mail anxiety.  It just takes too darn long for the mail to travel overseas.  And I'm nervous about jinxing myself.

It's happened before...

My second pregnancy started right before a deployment too.  I blogged:

I wrote two weeks ago about giving life-altering news over the phone to my husband in Iraq.  First I had to tell him I was pregnant.  Then I had to tell him the nurse said we'd probably lose the baby.  Then I got to happily tell him that I'd had an ultrasound and saw our baby's little heartbeat.

And then Thursday I had to tell him that the baby has died and that I have to miscarry without him.

But what I didn't mention in that paragraph is that I had mailed my husband the ultrasound photo of our healthy little baby.  And then the baby died while the photo was still in the mail.  So my husband already knew our baby was dead by the time the jubilant card arrived announcing how exciting it was that our baby was fine.

And the card arrived on Father's Day.  Oy.

So this time, I am scared to death to send the ultrasound photos.  I am afraid that disaster will strike during their two-week journey to my husband.  So they're piling up.  I have three weeks of healthy ultrasound photos that I am too nervous to mail.  I have scanned them to him so he could see them over email, but I just want him to have the hard copies too.  But I've been burned before...

Why can't the mail go faster?

Comments

[TheKitchenDispatch]

*sigh*
I'm sorry, doll.
No answers for you.
Just a hand and a hug.

[Sarah P.]

First, I'm very happy to hear that all is well so far and I will be sending all the joyous love happy baby vibes I've got in me your way.

Second, there's nothing wrong with holding onto everything and waiting, it's understandable considering your history. Have you had a chance to tell him about your anxiety over sending them? It might help if you haven't.

Take care of yourself!

[ProudNLoyal]

Send it all in a priority envelope! Takes less than a week!! And congrats and good luck, my prayers are with you!

[Allison]

I can understand your concerns so why not just either scan and send by e-mail or take a picture with a digital camera so that he can see them the next time he checks his e-mail. I had a similar situation and did not have my ultrasound until after mine had deployed to Afghanistan. My last pregnancy ended in a miscarriage last year and I am now 32 weeks and getting very excited. I hope and pray everything goes well for you also.

[betherfany]

You can't spend your entire life thinking about last time. If you did that you would never get married because last time you didn't when you dated. You'd never get pregnant because last time you didn't. You'd never be happier then you are right now, and you are happy, share that with your husband.

[Guard Wife]

Perhaps if it were more clear that the only communication you have with your husband for the foreseeable future were snail mail (no phone, no computer, no e-mail, no blog reading), it might make more sense why this is difficult for you & for him. I remember so well the previous cards, etc. and understand why you would be hesitant, even if you're occasionally happy (when not riddled with morning sickness). Keep on trucking and I'll pray he ends up somewhere that you two can be a little more easily connected.

[name must not be blank]

Oh I hate this situation. I'm hoping you're working harder on keeping your body anxiety free than giving your DH a play by play.

[David M]

The Thunder Run has linked to this post in the blog post From the Front: 08/03/2009 News and Personal dispatches from the front and the home front.

http://www.thunderrun.us/2009/08/from-front-08032009.html

[Sara V.]

Wow, that's just a whole truckload of awful. So sorry for both of you.

No advice, but just an open ear to listen. Everything you've said makes total sense to me. It's natural to be hesitant and don't let anyone tell you differently. After all you've been through, feel however you like.

[GBear]

Having had three miscarriages between Bubba and Goober (who now says he's not sure he likes Goober and would much rather be called "Maverick" - not b/c of Top Gun, thank heavens since he's going into third grade!, but b/c a "Maverick" is someone who's 'out of the bounds', Oh Good Grief!), I understand your hesitancy.

But...life was meant to be celebrated and shared - short and long. Migs taught me this through the Cancer diagnosis at the ripe old age of three and all the resultant medical garbage. Share them - send the photos priority, very good idea - but share!

Keep feeling sick and lousy and try not to be too scared when the morning sickness goes away! We're all keeping you in our prayers and sending warm and loving thoughts your way!

[Love My Soldier]

First off, my prayers are with you Sarah!

Like another lady stated, you can send the mail priority, which guarantees 1-2 weeks at most. And the Post Office actually has Priority boxes specifically for APO and FOB addresses. They are very helpful, and cost less! Plus the package arrives sooner. My Soldier hasn't received his first box yet (which I sent last Saturday) but I don't think he's at his post yet anyways. We'll see! But the dilemna I'm facing with mail is I will write him, and then he may have time to email me or Skype, and I find that my letters are going to seem repetitive of what I've already said to him. But from what I heard, soldiers don't care and are just happy to be able to open hand-written letters. :)

Stay encouraged!