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January 31, 2008|
than catching up with friends who don't live nearby?
Yesterday, I caught up with two, very dear friends. One lives halfway 'round the world and the other lives just one state away. One I haven't seen for 2 and1/2 years and the other I haven't seen for about 14 years.
January 31, 2008|
I like moving, I really do. I know, that makes me weird. But aside from the fact that moving seems like a vacation paid for out of the ever-so-gracious pocket of Uncle Sam, moving also allows me something particularly necessary after a few years (or sometimes a few months) in one spot.
The ability to start over where people don't know me, my family, or our... um... "issues" is a God Send.
Case in point - today's incident at Little Gym. Which I will be happy to leave behind.
January 31, 2008|
Thank you LTC Bramlish, Ohio National Guard, for giving me a new tool to use in the effort to keep connected with Papa Bear while he's away - Connect and Join.
January 30, 2008|
A lot of pimping going on, so take your time and browse all of the links below. And remember, if you want to Pimp Your Stuff (or someone else's stuff) for the February edition, click here for details. Consider it free advertising.
Please note that we're not endorsing any of these products or services, we're simply passing along information. If you choose to participate in a study, research project or documentary, that is your decision. The SpouseBUZZ authors are not affiliated with any of the projects/products featured in this post.
January 30, 2008|
Today I had a moment between teaching my son to subtract and grading the third daughter's math. Because I tend to multitask when possible, I decided to clean behind the coffee maker on the counter while I was drilling #3 on her spelling words.
WHAT IS THAT SMELL????? And other than resolving never to move the coffee maker from it's ordained spot on the counter, how do I prevent that in the future?
January 30, 2008|
January 29, 2008|
Papa Bear left on Sunday for three-month training class. It's been two days and he's got total job security here at home! Sunday night the microwave went out.....Monday morning the boys' upstairs bathroom toilet broke.....last night I realized that I'd never learned how to TIVO.
January 29, 2008|
Noteworthy items from this week's Military Report:
January 28, 2008|
Today I woke up and was at the point of no return. I'd had it. I didn't care how cold it was outside, I didn't care if my kids were cranky, I didn't care if I felt overwhelmed with things to accomplish.
I WAS GOING TO EXERCISE IF IT KILLED ME.
January 28, 2008|
The milspouse group is a diverse one - to say the least. But, we also have a great deal in common on many fronts.
Let's find out just how much we have in common and also how diverse we all are, when it comes to things that we really like to do in our personal time.
Do you have a hobby?
January 28, 2008|
It took us a while to choose a winner for the December "What's Your Story" contest, but we finally have one! After you read the winning essay, I think you'll agree that it's appropriate we're publishing this after Christmas.
January 27, 2008|
At the beginning of 2008, I decided that I had had enough of the clutter in my house. It was actually affecting my ability to get anything done. The piles of notebooks, books, magazines, clothes, ETC., were driving me mad. LAW, Wifeunit and Cassandra can attest to the fact that I have alot of crap. I do.
My goal for 2008 is to get organized. I mean really, really GET ORGANIZED!!!! I don't have an upcoming move to force me to declutter so I have to find it within myself to get it done.
So yesterday, I cleaned out my pantry.
January 26, 2008|
Hey, where'd that package go?
Military Mail Allows for Email Inquiry on Lost Parcels
Are you a military member who has deployed or redeployed overseas, and are still waiting on your footlocker, duffle bag, or parcel to arrive? There is now an e-mail address to inquire or claim mail that has yet to arrive and was sent more than 60 days from the date of mailing. Military members and their families can now contact the Military Postal Service Agency (MPSA) at the following e-mail address: mpsa-mrc@conus.army.mil.
January 25, 2008|
One of the many, many reasons that I love being a military spouse is that I have been able to successfully avoid choosing an actual career. First, there were the moves. Then, there were the kids. In the future, there is another deployment. However, I know that eventually I will have to get it together and make plan. I have all four kids in school this year, and He of the Sea is coming up on 17 years of active duty this year. I am rapidly running out of excuses.
January 25, 2008|
Airforcewife is constantly coming up with these embarrassing stories about herself. I don't know if she really is a disaster magnet, or if she only imagines that the whole world is staring at her in horror when really no one has noticed the hole in her skirt or the pee her son deposited in the pool. In all the times I've been around her, I have never seen her in all her mortifying glory, but she does have quite a reputation for being accident and embarrassment prone.
So much so that I've begun to imagine her face on literary characters who find themselves in airforcewife-ian situations.
January 25, 2008|
So here I sit, in the waiting room, while DH is in surgery for the 35th time since he was wounded in June 2005. This surgery is outpatient, so at least DH can leave with me today. DH has an AWESOME surgeon, so it's not the surgery that bothers me. It's the waiting and wondering. Waiting for the "all clear" after surgery, and wondering what life will be like when we get home.
January 25, 2008|
If my husband was to deploy, I think football season was the best time of the year. I would become the sole owner of the remote control on Thursday night, all day/night Saturday and all day/night Sunday. No audible screaming or cursing at the television would occur. A blissful existence.
My confession? I ended up putting football on the tube just for the background noise. I even paid attention to the progress of my husband's team while he was away. If confronted with this confession by my husband, I will deny, deny, deny....
The Superbowl is next Sunday. My husband's team will be playing. Can I please come spend the night with one of you next Sunday?
January 24, 2008|
The greatest thing about Spousebuzz, is the connectivity it provides to other milspouses going through the same you you are going through. It is a valuable resource of information. A place you can go to see if your current situation, and your reaction to circumstances are NORMAL.
We at SpouseBuzz, will never claim to be experts. Heck I do not know one military wife who would claim to be an expert.
January 24, 2008|
As you know, I've been doing this Navy thing for a few years. 15, actually. And I am still dying to know the answer to this one question: How much am I supposed to tip the baggers?
Those of you who don't frequent the commissary probably don't wonder about this much. I shop nearly every day. Because there are six of us, and because our kitchen has about 4 cupboards, and because we live one block from the commissary. I take my wagon and call it exercise. I'm pretty happy with this.
However, it is getting a little expensive, this tipping the baggers every darn day. I was talking to my neighbor about this, and mentioned that I feel like I should tip at least a dollar, even when I've picked up $8 worth of groceries, and it is one bag. She said that she usually tips $1 per bag - I about fell over. Either I'm a tremendous cheapskate or she's been drinking too much of the commissary free coffee. At our previous home, I went to the commissary once every two weeks and spent a couple of hundred dollars - at least two carts worth. I'd be tipping at least $20 bucks at her rate.
So I'm wondering, what do you think?
January 24, 2008|
We run into all sorts of people during our tours. Have you ever noticed that every assignment seems to have certain personality types that people fall into? There's usually "The Busy Guy" - this is the guy (and I use the term in a gender neutral way) that is always at work before everyone else, leaves after everyone else, comes in on the weekends, and just looks weird when they aren't wearing their UOD.
Then there's "The Complaining Guy". You know which one - the one whose office is too hot/cold/moist/dry/loud/quiet, whose lumbago acts up as soon as someone DITY moves and the office volunteers to help pack up, who gets 1/2 the work done in twice the time as everyone else, and knows every single step necessary to file an IG complaint while often offering to coach others through the process.
We also can't forget to mention "Exasperated Guy". Exasperated Guy is the one who always seems to have the last minute projects land squarely in his/her lap. This is not due to poor planning, but rather because Exasperated Guy keeps telling him/herself that THIS time s/he will NOT help the people who don't do their work when they are supposed to, s/he will let them take their medicine so they will learn! Then, of course, when crunch time rolls around, Exasperated Guy can't stand it and jumps in to pull out a last minute save. Exasperated Guy usually has a lot Tums hanging around the office and does Pepto shots like they're mixed with jello.
Most recently, Air Force Guy and I have been having several run-ins with a type that I like to call, "The Poacher".
January 24, 2008|
For the week of January 22, 2008
1. House Approves Revised Defense Authorization Bill
2. Military Children to Benefit from New Interstate Compact
3. New Arizona Tax Law Benefits Military Families
4. TRICARE for Life Goes Digital
5. TBI Army Task Force Released Their Findings
6. Audio Books Program a Great Benefit for Military Families
7. FDA Releases Recommendations Regarding Use of Over-the-Counter Cough and Cold Products
January 23, 2008|
I remember stocking the cupboards with my husband's favorite foods just before he redeployed. I purchased all the ingredients to make the yummy casseroles and homemade treats that he enjoys. My husband was going to return to home-cooked heaven. Yes.He.Was.
Since then, I've had little time or inclination to don an apron and play Martha Stewart. I was raised by a mother who knows her way around the kitchen, so I developed a fondness for cooking, but I've become much less fond of the kitchen over the past few years. Time was always the enemy. The grill and microwavable bags were my friends.
Remember my recent whine over holiday travel? While we were stuck at airports and flying across the country, I took a copy of Chef's Magazine with me. I became enamored with all of the fabulous appliances and cooking materials. I remembered how happy it made me to fix those wonderful, home-cooked meals for my husband when he returned. Flipping though the magazine reminded me of that time and sparked a renewed interest in bringing my inner domestic goddess back to life. I decided that I longed to get back in the kitchen and put a little TLC back into our meals. I dogeared pages containing images of new cookware that I intended to purchase and made a silent vow to heat up the kitchen. And did I ever....
January 23, 2008|
Changing schools can be a huge ordeal for military families and military children. Education curriculum and education requirements can vary tremendously between states and between school districts.
For those reasons the Interstate Compact on Educational Opportunity for Military Children is very important. Find out if this issue is being addressed in your state.
January 22, 2008|
You have a few days left to submit your TRICARE questions for our show with General Granger.
January 22, 2008|
Over the past few days, as a result of the recent USA Today article, our collective heads have been swirling with thought. Emails between the SpouseBUZZ crew have been flying back and forth. And I do mean flying. You offered your suggestions, too. We don't all agree on the right approach, but I thank each of you for taking the time to weigh in, and for a brutally honest and thought-provoking discussion.
Family support issues are complex. They cut across rank, branch and geography. Peacetime and wartime. We discuss family support all the time, but in a piece mill fashion. It's difficult to get your arms around family support when you think of it as a giant block, which is what I attempted to do a few days ago. I asked some open-ended questions of you, and you answered appropriately. For now, let's take one fragment at a time. The intent of this post is to focus on areas which we have the power to influence and improve. We're "drilling down," so to speak.
Grab a cup of coffee. Here goes:
January 22, 2008|
My Husband had recently applied, and was hired to a new position.
This has been good news for our family, on several fronts.
We will be moving to our home state, where we have family and friends, I will be moving to a familiar area! No more getting lost, and not knowing where I am. (yes, even after 7 years, I still get lost).
Oh and winter. Real winter. In fact I just got off the phone with my Sister, and it is a balmy 16 degrees right now, without the wind chill. Brrrr.
January 22, 2008|
My father spent a few years in the Army before he met my mother. He has a love of all-things-Army. Many years ago, while stationed in Texas, my husband and I had some single soldiers over to our home for Thanksgiving dinner. My father happened to be in town on this particular Thanksgiving, so he got to meet and hang out with the guys. The soldiers enjoyed listening to my dad's stories about the good ol' days and how, while in Germany during field exercises, anyone who captured Elvis would get a three-day pass (bet Elvis enjoyed being such a prized target).
Pat, one of the soldiers who was at the house, worked very closely with my husband and was widely respected, both personally and professionally. We became very close friends and my husband and I have stayed in touch with him throughout the years. In a roundabout way, that is.
January 22, 2008|
Noteworthy items from this week's Military Report:
Association Offers Congressional Guide
Exchanges Sponsor Sweepstakes
Female Marine Nominees Sought for Award
Helping Children Cope During Deployments
Minnesota Program Goes National
Navy Offers Free Audio Books and More
New Program in West Virginia
New TRICARE Advocacy Program
Program Connects Servicemembers, Civilians
Protecting Your Social Security Number
Quick-Assist Loans for Sailors
Scholarship Program for Military Spouses
TRICARE to Cover Lap-Band Procedure
VA Offers Hospice Care
January 21, 2008|
Blogger and Army wife Sis B just went through an ugly custody battle for her son. At the trial, her ex-husband's lawyer came at her current husband, Soldier Boy, with this line of questioning:
At the custody trial a few weeks ago, my husband was attacked for his decision to join the military even though he had a daughter. [The ex-husband]'s attorney came at him and asked accusingly, "So your military service is more important to you than your children!?"
And my husband sat up straighter, talked just a smidgeon louder, and said, "I do this FOR my children. I do this so that maybe one day they won't have to. I do this so that they have a better future. So no, my military service is not more important than my children. I serve FOR my children."
His answer was succinct and eloquent (and poorly paraphrased here), and completely lost on everyone else in the room who have never served, who do not understand we are a nation at war, who do not comprehend the meaning of duty or sacrifice. It kills me that he had to stand up to that attack, that he was ridiculed, that they made light of what he has given up.
I find it disgusting that a lawyer would try to use military service to paint someone as an uncaring parent. I don't know all of the details of the trial, or of Sis B's life and previous marriage, but according to the posts on her blog, it sounds like the judge counted the military lifestyle as a negative strike in making the custody decision. And that sets my blood boiling.
Deployment does not make you unfit to be a parent.
January 21, 2008|
I'm not the most politically adept person. I have a certain knowledge of basic protocol and am not completely embarassing when left in public, unless of course I'm really hungry! I firmly believe that people should 'help themselves' when in my house.
Protocol has always eluded me. I do my best, but there are so many rules!! Most of them unstated, unwritten or not put in front of me in such a way that I can't ignore them! For instance, did you know that name tags should be worn on the right side? Makes sense, that way, when you shake hands, the other person can see your name. Who'd have thought?!?!?! But there's more!
January 21, 2008|
Let it hereby be known that AirForceWife can now knit socks.
Let the love flow...
January 20, 2008|
As I check around the military spouse blogs, I've noticed something. Whenever pictures are posted I think, "Wow, that chick has a totally hawt husband!" Not that I'm being a pervert or home-wrecker, mind you. I mean it in the same vein that I might say, "Oh, what a lovely sunset!"
At this point, I can't remember the last time I didn't notice the hawt-factor. I mean, really. Is it a chicken or an egg? Which came first, the hot guy or the military?
Or is it because whenever I see one of those uniforms I just melt?
Whatever the reason, the research seems to bear the thought out. Military dudes = hot. And of course, Air Force Guy = hottest.
So sit on that, Hollywood. I don't need your Brad Pitt pin-up poster. I'll just go sit somewhere on base and soak in the view.
January 20, 2008|
The Army just threw us a curve ball. This one was a bit different than others that have been thrown at us over the years. This one was a good curve ball, and one we're very excited about. Now, I suppose I should start off with a caveat - this too can change. Although that goes without saying with this crowd. All of you know that.
January 19, 2008|
Something like this may already exist in one or more places in our military community, but I have yet to hear about it. So just in case, I'm throwing an idea out there that I think could really help families of wounded troops. I'm kinda piggy-backing off Andi's post regarding changes to our military (as a whole) that we mil-spouses think would be beneficial.
Here goes... (this is a bit longer than I intended, but I encourage you to read to the end)
January 19, 2008|
I've been working on some self-introductions, and my drafts are truly witty, or thoughtful, or just darn good. But they will also never be perfect, and so I'm diving right in.
I'm She of the Sea, as Andi introduced in the post below. I've been married to a Navy Intel guy for 15 years and we have four daughters. We're enjoying the last few months of peace while he is in a pretty easy job, after which he will be preparing to deploy for 12 months. (Really, 12, they promise!)
I'm a little in awe of the SpouseBUZZ authors and wonder if I'll be able to keep up - they are so smart, and funny, and caring. I guess we'll find out! I've been a SpouseBUZZ reader for a while now, and I'm learning more about the other services every day. I'm excited to offer the Navy perspective and I hope I can relate to some Navy specific situations that other readers have.
Again, thanks for the nice comments already posted. This place feels like home already!
January 19, 2008|
Some of you may have noticed the new icon on the right-hand side of the page. The mermaid one. At long last, SpouseBUZZ has brought a Navy wife on board. We're thrilled to welcome She of the Sea to SpouseBUZZ. You'll be hearing from our new author very soon. She's a great addition and you're going to love her.
Welcome Aboard, She of the Sea!
Anchor's Away (or whatever you Navy folk say....).
January 18, 2008|
I am honored to be a part of the Ohio National Guard Interservice Family Assistance Committee (ISFAC). As I am an Air Force spouse, you might find it a bit odd that I am part of this group, it being a Guard thing and all. OK, it's sponsored by the Guard, but it's truly inclusive. Wednesday, I was honored to sit in with people from all services, affiliations with military (spouse, children (mostly represented by parents) and family members) and volunteer organizations (this was my original entre into the group). I don't know if any other Guard units or states have these organizations, but it you don't - you should. Take a note from Ohio's page and get on board. This group is truly out to take care of the troops and the homefront. Kudos go out to LTC Bramlish and Michele Gire - not to mention the Governor's office who is incredibly supportive!
Thought I'd share a bit about the ISFAC and then write some other posts about the great things they are accomplishing here in Ohio!
January 18, 2008|
I spoke with my Mother in Law this morning.
It is cold where she lives. She told me she spent the day thinking about her Father. Her Father was a Veteran and fought in the Battle of The Bulge and Normandy.
She said she spent her day feeling chilled down to her bones, and was thinking about her Father. The only gifts her Father had ever bought for her were coats. She said he had a gift for buying the warmest of warm coats, and even as an adult woman she would be surprised by the occasional gift of a warm coat.
We spoke about the Battle of The Bulge and the length of time he had probably spent feeling cold.
It was a wonderful reminder about how much one person is willing to sacrifice for others.
January 17, 2008|
I knew something was up yesterday as soon as I turned on my phone and opened my inbox. And it was. A big article in USA Today about the stresses being placed on military families.
FORT BRAGG, N.C. — During the worst of Bravo Troop's 15-month tour in Iraq, when soldiers were dying in bunches, families here poured out their fear, frustrations and even hysteria onto one young woman: Bana Miller.
She's not Army. She's not trained. Her only qualification, then at age 24, was being an officer's wife who volunteered to run Bravo Troop's Family Readiness Group —a job of e-mailing and organizing potluck dinners in peacetime.
But when Bravo went to war, she became a social worker, grief counselor and a 24-hour hotline overnight. At various times, wives threatened to commit themselves to a mental institution or go to the media if Miller did not help bring their husbands home.
"I was in this alternative universe thinking: 'What has my life become?' " says Miller, who grew up in the Main Line suburbs of Philadelphia and married the boy she met in seventh grade.
As the Iraq war nears a sixth year, the Army has more than 3,000 volunteers such as Bana Miller, and many are buckling under the pressure of duties that they never expected would be so hard or last so long. The Army and Marine Corps lean on these family support volunteers to be the first stop for families struggling to deal with war, separation and loss.
Click here to read the full story.
Some interesting things happened yesterday. A Veteran's Service Organization and at least one lawmaker are quite interested in hearing the opinions of military families. What, realistically, can and should be done to better support military families? We're asking for your help, and for your honest, no-holes-barred opinions.
January 17, 2008|
To keep up with my husband, my friends from various duty stations, and my family I have no fewer than three instant messaging programs on my computer. I may have more. I've stopped counting.
January 17, 2008|
My husband and I are total homebodies. We never take leave, we never go away for the weekend, and we barely make it to the mailbox on weekends at home. We haven't been on a trip together in two and a half years (unless you count going to our parents' houses, which I totally don't count as a vacation.)
So in December, we decided to do something uncharacteristic: we're taking a trip to see AirForceFamily!
January 16, 2008|
I have never watched the show, but I certainly hope my fellow Army Wife wins lots and lots of money:
The wife of a soldier serving in Afghanistan will appear tonight on NBC’s hit game show, “Deal or No Deal,” in a special episode devoted to military spouses.
The show, hosted by Howie Mandel, will air 8 p.m. Central Standard Time and feature an audience of military members and spouses.
The contestant, Shequila Farrelly, 39, is the wife of Staff Sgt. Patrick Farrelly, who is currently serving in Afghanistan on a military transition team attached to the 1st Brigade Combat Team based at Fort Riley, Kan.
And I laughed at this part, because it's soooo true:
After being invited on the show, Farrelly said show producers peppered her with questions about her life and interests.
“Everything I talk about is military-related — duty stations, people you meet, how wives have to support each other,” she said. “We’re an important part of the mission and sometimes people forget about those things.”
January 16, 2008|
I'm always looking for out-of-the-ordinary gifts to give. Something that is a bit unusual and personalized. I just found something that is right up my alley. I even said to myself, "next time Mr. Andi deploys, he and his colleagues are getting some of these."
January 16, 2008|
TRICARE is a 'double edged sword' type of subject for most military families. However, TRICARE can be great and I must give them props for continuing to roll out improved services that help military families.
January 15, 2008|
I will preface this story with, I am from the Midwest. We have no accents. Which means I find any accent interesting, and enjoyable. I LOVE accents. I do. In fact at the top of my list of favorite American accents is that of those who inhabit the great state of Minnesota, I love it, and could listen to it all day. A close second, is a Southern accent, but not just any southern accent, I have a preference for Northern Louisiana. Third is Boston. So, if you are from any of those areas of our great country, you have my ear all day if you need it.
January 15, 2008|
Look, as if getting kicked off a talk show, flashing my nether-bits to the Comcast guy, broadcasting my eliminatory functions, and having my son urinate on the base commander's lawn weren't proof enough that I am often somewhat less than socially acceptable in polite circles, I'm about to write about something that I'll bet will make the ever-gracious Andi cringe.
But since I'm far closer to Lucille Ball than Audrey Hepburn (despite all my yearnings to be cool and classy in perfect pearls and an immaculate sweater dress), I'm totally going to go there.
Please, if you will be offended with a post that is not generally acceptable discussion in polite company - skip this jump...
January 15, 2008|
Noteworthy items from this week's Military Report:
January 14, 2008|
I haven't seen the new movie starring that cutie from Grey's Anatomy, but the concept is easy enough to grasp...always the bridesmaid and never the bride means a closetful of some pretty heinous dresses.
Translated into military spouse-speak, weddings become military balls and my closet becomes