Who's With Me?

It's a holiday weekend. Yippie! Or not...

I have no plans. None. Think I'll just haunt the SpouseBUZZ halls and torture you with my sick sense of humor. Well no, that probably wouldn't be good, especially for site traffic, which will be in the toilet anyway because many of you will be off sipping drinks on a beach somewhere. Yes, there's a twinge of jealousy there, but I do hope you have a great time and enjoy the long weekend.

So, who's sticking around this weekend, and what do you want to talk about? You name the topic.

Quiet Panic

We have discussed various realms of deployment and reintegration in the past.  I have an experience to share with you that seemingly came out of nowhere and dates back to a previous deployment.

What a Deal!

Imagine this - finding a career that let's you train from home, work from home and move without losing your job.

It's out there, waiting for you to seize it. This job allows you to take a self-paced training course, from the privacy of your own home. You can also apply for a special military spouse scholarship to help defer training costs. And speaking of training costs, tuition for military spouses can be paid on a payment plan, a no-interest payment plan! Forget having to fork over a lump-sum payment. The best part? Once your training is complete, you will be certified to work in a field that will never make you leave the house if you don't want to. No, that's probably not the best part - the best part is that this career moves with you. When the military decides it's time for you to move down the road -- or overseas -- no problem, you still have a job. And, you'll probably have a job with a very military-friendly employer.

Sound too good to be true? Last night, I was amazed to find out it's not, and many military spouses are just starting to learn the same thing. In just 29 minutes, you can learn all you need to know, by simply clicking the button below. We don't do gimmicks here at SpouseBUZZ, this is a real opportunity for any of you who are looking for a flexible, transportable career. A career that is a good fit with the military lifestyle.

For more information, click here.

It's the little things

I had to re-register my car today. The state provides a military exemption for state taxes on car registration for military members who are not Hawai'i residents. So I went down to Rear Detachment and waited an hour for the RearD people to get out of a meeting so that I could get the form I needed to exempt us from the state taxes.

I took my registration, military ID, deployment orders, power of attorney, and military exemption form down to the Satellite City Hall today to get new tags for my car. I waited in line, double-checking that I had everything I needed. I get to the counter and the woman asks me what my rank is.

I have no rank.

Jenny Sokol Chronicles Her Life and Ours

There was a treasure waiting for me every week in the Orange County Register when I lived at Pendleton.

Jenny Sokol.

In 2004, I first read her column, titled "Singing the Cowgirl Blues." Jenny wrote about getting used to her husband being gone.  All the little things that we do as we slowly accept that our husband isn't coming home for dinner that night or any other for a long time.  She nailed it and I was hooked!  Sadly, her column wasn't archived at the time or I'd put up a link to it.

Back By Popular Demand

No more Army Wives on Sunday nights. How to fill the void? We have an idea...

Is it Possible for Military Spouses to Find a Transportable Career?

Military spouses looking for a career often face challenges that most of our civilian counterparts do not. We're always on the move. New town. New job market. New industries. A resume as long as I-95, with gaps in employment as wide as the Grand Canyon. Oh, and there's the whole low-man-on-the-totem-pole issue. By the time you've built up enough seniority to actually receive some nice bonuses/benefits, it's time to move and start all over again. Let's face it, finding and maintaining a career is neither fun nor easy for many military spouses.

But there are options - great options, and we need to be aware of them.

How much involvement is too much?

We've all heard our mom's tell us that just because one aspirin was good, two or three won't necessarily be better.  But what about our involvement as spouses, some involvement is good and expected, but can we be involved too much?  Especially in what could liberally be called, the affairs of state?  As evidenced here at SpouseBUZZ, there are innumerable examples and instances of the power of independent thought being followed by group action.  Some call that democracy at its best.

Okay -- back to the question. Is there ever, and what would be the mile marker to identify where we as spouses shouldn't tread when it comes to the operations of a military organization?  (Deep breath here.)

What if you heard that changes were coming to your local military medical treatment facility (MTF) that could directly impact you and your children's previous "norm" on expected care?

Operation Santa-itis....

This is a serious disease, folks...not to be taken lightly..

Some symptoms include:
While shopping, you look at an individual item (such as a pack of gum) and multiply the price by 100 or 200 or 300, etc...
You start hoarding boxes and extra large ziploc bags.
You require lots of assistance at the post office.
Packages mysteriously appear on your front porch from people you've never met.

I ought to know...I caught the disease 3 years ago....

In Case You Missed It

Last night I noticed that someone who claims to work on the production team of Army Wives left a comment on our season finale discussion thread. Some of you already noticed. I see that MedWife seized the opportunity to tell her to please get the berets right next season (heh).

At any rate, thought I would point this out to you in case you haven't re-read the discussion thread since we first published it. Good to know they're reading.

Shakin' My Groove Thang

I would like someone - ANYONE - to explain to me how on earth it can be possible that I'm not a skinny stick woman with all the running around, cleaning, picking up after my kids and yard work that I do. 

Whatever the quantum physics of the situation (I'm sure there are over 8000 different mathematical equations to explain why constant motion doesn't burn the amount of calories we think it should) - and yes, I understand the role of genetics and the fact that life is just not fair!- I find myself firmly in the camp of "People Who Need to Exercise Regularly".

I spend a lot of time in the workout DVD section of various stores.

Military Life Really IS an Adventure

You know all those military recruiting campaigns that portray military life as a great adventure? You get to see the world, experience new things, meet interesting people, do interesting things and on and on... This morning, I was thinking about how true it really is, but not always in the conventional sense, the way the commercials play it.

Did you know?

Included in this week's Military Report:

Paying Back Premiums Unavoidable 

The 3 Most Common Education Questions

Health Care Benefits Improve for Reserve

The Fleet Reserve Association Offers Free Guide For Sea Service

Exchanges Expand Shipping Services

Meet the Challenge: Landstuhl Heroes Deserve Your Support

Immigration Information for the Military 

Marine Given Guidelines on Dwell Time

Military Spouse Employment Study

Mattel Recalls More Toys 

Reach Out and Read 

Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors 

Firefighters Fund Helps Servicemembers

Commissaries Promote Family Day

spit take

*the following post is FILLED to the brim with me digressing*

Back when I was a new, and dewy skinned new bride. (*cough* I was 20, at one time) We were trekking from my little hometown on the great plains of Nebraska to Fort Bragg, North Carolina. Desert Storm had just ended, and my newly acquired Husband and I were headed across this great land in my Pontiac Sunbird, with everything I OWNED fitting in one car. (Can you imagine all of my life fitting in to one car? A little car? There are days I long for that simplicity.)

Confessions of a Military Wife part 2 (follow on to armywifetoddlermom's post)

I'm sad that they retired the original Birth Control Glasses in basic training.

I liked them.  Good memories.

Army Wives: Season Finale Discussion Thread

Hummm, where to start? Let's make it simple this week. I didn't particularly like the season finale because I thought the ending was weak. After twelve weeks of pretty solid entertainment, they lost me at the end. While the deployment storyline was, I thought, very well done, the ending scene was just, well....not very fulfilling.

SpouseBUZZ Pajama Party - TONIGHT! Topic: Army Wives Season Finale

Update: Might be fun to put your predictions for tonight's finale in the comment section, then we can compare them to what happened at the end of the show and see if anyone guessed correctly. No fair if you've already heard what happened....

The season finale of Army Wives airs tonight at 10:00 p.m. EDT. Immediately following, SpouseBUZZ Talk Radio will go live to discuss what is being described as "the shocking finale." Many of you wanted us to host this show, and you agreed to participate, so this show is for you. You are the guest tonight and we can't wait to hear from you.

At 11:00 p.m. EDT, we'll see you in the Yahoo Chat Room. Click here to listen to the show, and be sure to call 646.478.5665 to be live on-air with us as we discuss your reaction to the Army Wives season finale. Rumor has it we're going to have plenty to talk about.....

Those of you on the West Coast, you can listen to the archive version of the show after Army Wives is shown in your area.

See ya tonight!

Military Injured Relief Funds

Was someone in your family injured in Iraq/Afghanistan? Did you know that your family may be entitled to a state grant based on injuries sustained during deployment to Iraq/Afghanistan? It’s true. Some states are providing financial grants to wounded service members.  The money is intended to give assistance to military families and ease some of the financial burdens assumed when a loved one is injured.  It's a beautiful gift from the taxpayers of the state - to recognize a need and try to do something to ease the burden.

A Friendship in Transformation

I have a friend I have known as long as my husband's been in the Army.  Her husband and mine started at the same time and followed similar career paths.  They both ended up in Germany, though in different units in different cities, and both deployed at the same time.  The wife and I have maintained an email-based friendship throughout the years.

When we first met, this couple was just as gung-ho about the Army as we were.  And I thought my friend made an excellent Army wife: I never heard her complain about military annoyances or deployments, beyond the normal grousing that we all do.  She rolled with the punches and seemed to take everything in stride.  I thought her ability to never let anything get her down was phenomenal.

Here we are, five years later, and my husband and I are just as gung-ho as we once were, possibly even more.  And our friends absolutely can't wait to get out of the military.

Because We Need to Know, and We Must Be There For Them

I didn't sleep a wink last night.

Recruiting: Army Wife Style

Who are these Army wives? I want them. I'm not sure what I'm going to do with them, but I want them.

Bwahahahah. Love it!

Yes, the video is on auto-play, even though I switched the loop in the HTML code, which usually fixes the problem. Any tech geniuses out there who can advise? I'd rather the vid not play automatically, I know that can become annoying.

Update: Okay, I haven't been able to edit the code so that the video doesn't auto-play, and that's highly annoying, so I've pulled the video and I'm just going to point you to the link, and trust me, you won't be sorry you clicked there. 

Update II: Thanks to reader Sly, who helped me crack the code. Click play (twice) Here ya go:

source

I Don't Like My Children

Now, let me clarify.  I love my children.  I love them very much.  I would step in front of an M1 tank for them if necessary.  I gave up a career to stay home and take care of them and teach them, and I've never regretted it. 

But there are times - and not even infrequently - when I don't like my children.  Like now.

And yes, of course I feel guilty as sin about it. 

Road Trip and "togetherness"

DH and I recently took a road trip of more than 2600 miles - from Seattle, WA to western PA!  He was TDY for the summer and I flew out to WA to meet him so we could drive back together, minus the children!  Something we've never done before.  The kiddos went to Grandma's and DH and I would spend a whole week+ together in the truck... and I was hoping we would survive the trip without one of us hitch-hiking the rest of the way home!

We managed to make it home, both of us together, and we still like each other!  That may sound rather harsh in context, but I am sure other milspouses can identify in some way with the feeling of "too much togetherness."  I'll explain what I mean...

This is for Drowning Pool

airforcewife and I had the pleasure of talking with Drowning Pool's lead singer, Ryan McCombs recently. If you didn't hear the interview (Ryan makes his appearance about 20 minutes in so you can fast-forward), you might not know the extent of Drowning Pool's support for our troops and their families. Ryan passionately defended our troops. He praised them -- and us -- over and over again.   

And Now, I Have Reached My Breaking Point

The U.S. Army has played some pretty nasty tricks on me before, but this time...this time, they've gone too far.

A Frank Conversation About the Unthinkable

A couple of weeks ago, AWTM and I interviewed Kristin Henderson on SpouseBUZZ Talk Radio. We devoted the entire program to "anticipatory grief." That's a term that simply means that you grieve as if something bad has already happened, even though it hasn't. In my case, I was busy planning a funeral for someone who hadn't yet died. In AWTM's case, she was constantly going through the various "what if" scenarios. Unfortunately, the audio archive of that show is lost somewhere in cyberspace (groan). It was a great conversation.

Two weeks ago, we talked about what could happen. Tomorrow evening, we're going to talk about what did happen. Specifically what happened when two ladies had their lives turned upside down in the blink of an eye. One wife. One girlfriend. One unthinkable scenario - losing a loved one in the line of duty.

Get into that kitchen and rattle those pots and pans

It's been a blue couple of days here at Casa Semper Fi.  All of the "little" Semper Fis are back at their respective institutions of higher learning, Soul Sister has PCS'ed to the other side of the world, and Lancelot is back to work.  I don't know where my summer went but it is pretty much over. The house is very quiet and very empty.  AND it's been raining for two days. Blah...blah....blah...

In my kitchen is one of the best cures for the missing somebody blahs... 

Fireworks and Other Faux Pas

During Pamela's radio show on Army Wives Episode 11, she talked about her husband "bringing the fireworks" when he returns from a deployment.  Later Chase came to her and said her comments were embarrassing.  She said something in a very public forum that seemed OK for her comfort level, but that apparently wasn't OK for her husband's.

I bet several of us bloggers can relate to that...

Milestones

Yesterday,  we all woke under the same roof!  What a way to start the day.

You see, like most of you, my DH has been gone a lot in the past 5 years.  It is the nature of the job.  This has meant DH has missed a lot of milestones.   He has missed a lot, especially those events we consider milestones, and firsts.  First birthdays, smiles, giggles, words, crawling, standing, walking, teeth....

Did you know?

Included in this week's Military Report:

168,000 to Lose TRICARE Prime Coverage 

Add $5,400 to Your GI Bill 

Navy-Marine Corps Relief Society Scholarships 

Full Replacement Value Begins Soon 

Army Puts 'Temporary' Back in Orders 

New Loans, New Business for You 

State-by-State Guide to Disability Resources 

The Armed Services Blood Program 

Customer Service at MACH Speed 

TRICARE Reserve Select Coming 

Virtual Food Pantry Offers Assistance 

Air Force Seeks Nursing Program Applicants 

TRICARE Formulary Update Announced 

TRICARE Prime Travel Reimbursement

The Bleed-Over Effect

Military life doesn't just affect our lives. Often, it bleeds over into the lives of our close friends and family. We've discussed this topic before here at SpouseBUZZ.

Last week I was talking to a military spouse whose husband is currently deployed. We were talking about how her mother has been an enormous help, even though she lives several states over. My friend's mother recently flew in to take care of the children so that my friend could attend an out-of-town function. A function that she wouldn't have been able to attend without someone taking care of the children while she was away.

With a Little Help From My Friends

This has been one of those summers I will not be sorry to see the tail end of.  I might even throw a party.  A big one.  A giant party with a huge banner that says, "Don't Let Winter Hit you on the Butt on the Way Out!"  I can nearly guarantee that I will be standing outside giggling maniacally and cavorting in pajamas during the first cold storm of the season.  If you happen to witness it, don't bother to call the SP's and try to commit me.  Hubby knows the correct dosage of chocolate and cafe mocha vanilla for temporary insanity.

But, one good thing that has come out of this summer is that I have had a most important military spouse lesson reinforced several times over.

In this lifestyle, you only get by with a little help from your friends.

Army Wives: Episode Twelve Discussion Thread

While I enjoyed last night's episode of Army Wives, I was expecting a bigger build-up to next week's season finale. That didn't happen, but there was still plenty going on.

Tune In On This One!

I'm watching one of my Dog the Bounty Hunter marathons today, and just as I was getting ready to get up and clean my house I see the promos for this:

Gene Simmons Loves the Military!

I'm watching the episode right now, and it just feels good.  A&E replays their episodes a few times during the week, and usually offers them On Demand.  Why not watch?  It feels good to have someone walk in our shoes! 

It might be a little late to catch it the first time on the East Coast - but look for it at four on the West Coast!

Chronicles of Deployment

At Military Crop Talk , we are sharing ideas on keeping memories of our military life.  Sometimes, we capture those moment on film.  Oftentimes, it's quite by accident that we are able to record a poignant moment that you are certain your family will never forget.

Once that photo is developed, if you are your family's memory keeper, you're left to determine what to do with that once-in-a-lifetime moment.  What do you do, however, if that captured moment doesn't easily lend itself to the type of album pages you are used to creating?

Is there the "perfect" way to detail this moment?

The New Spouse Kit

I love chocolate.  A good fudge brownie can help get me through the worst days.  I'm also addicted to watching Dog the Bounty Hunter on TV.  When life seems to be going its worst, I tune in on On-Demand and hold a Dog marathon.

If I could not order Bath and Body Works Sparkling Peach lotion, I would not be able to yank myself back up to feeling somewhat desirable and sexy on those days when I've been wearing sweats and a tank top for a week straight, cleaned two toilet overflows, set off the smoke detector with burning chicken strips, and had at least two episodes where different children contracted something that caused violent vomiting and/or diarrhea.

Lately I've been mulling over a new idea (for my base, at least).  I'd like to start welcoming new spouses to the base with a basket full of the goodies they will need most while they are here with us.  And not one of those plastic bags filled with various coupons and a couple of pencils with phone numbers on them.  Surprisingly, there wasn't a whole lot of thought necessary into many of the goodies most necessary - the problem actually came about in narrowing the list to manageable proportions!

So, what did I come up with?

Military Spouses and Faith

I realize that military spouses are not a monolithic group of folks. We come from all walks of lives, have different religious affiliations and hold varying political opinions. However, I have heard from a lot of you who consider your faith to be an essential part of your lives, especially during deployments, so some of you may be interested in this story:

PCS and the Pet

Last week, I met some fabulous military spouses at our new duty station, and we began talking about our pets. One of them said that when her husband received PCS orders for an overseas assignment, they couldn't find an airline that would fly their cat. Not about to go without him, they ended up taking a ferry - a 54-hour ferry ride! Another wife told the story about her 17 year-old diabetic cat who required two shots of insulin per day in order to stay alive. They received orders to a place which required a six-week quarantine. Bad enough, but the quarantine kennel had a policy that prevented them from administering insulin shots.

This conversation made me think about the lengths we go to for our pets, and how difficult some PCS moves can be for both the pet, and the family who loves their pet.   

Admin Note

Our web hosting service will be doing some maintenance today and into the wee hours of Saturday morning, so there will be periods of time where you will be unable to post comments.

In Reverse Order

A couple of weeks ago, I received my copy of Army Wives: The Unwritten Code of Military Marriage, by Tanya Biank.

As most of you know, Tanya's book was the inspiration for the television series, Army Wives. I began reading the book as soon as I received it, but was forced to put it down to read something else that took priority. And I assure you, I wouldn't have put this book down for any other reason. Last weekend, during a road trip, I was able to pick it up again. I devoured the book and finished reading it in a matter of hours.

Wow! That Was Great!

Tonight we had a truly amazing interview on SpouseBUZZ Radio with GWoT thriller author Brad Thor.  Brad's most recent book, The First Commandment, was just released; and we had a great discussion about the current state of the GWoT, the problems facing our warfighters, and why when he travels he has to leave two hours earlier than necessary to get to the airport (hint: it has to do with showing his appreciation to our servicemembers). 

We also discovered that Brad Thor and I have something very much in common, which led to a very funny exchange about the words and names we choose to describe people, places and things in our lives. 

Brad is well known for his support of the military, and several times he very eloquently thanked, not just the servicemembers, but also military families for our role in supporting our loved ones and keeping them focused and able to carry out their mission.  So eloquently, in fact, that I very nearly choked up too much to end the show properly!  It's very rare that I'm at a loss for words, so you won't want to miss this historic event!

If you missed the show the first time around, you can catch the archived version at SpouseBUZZ Radio.

Re: You Want My Life?

I just received an email from a civilian in response to my post below. I started to simply update the post, but then decided it would be best to devote an entire post to this email. I also thought I would get this post up now in case other civilians are reading, and have the same questions/concerns (sorry to hog the blog today).

Mrs. X had questions, and I assured her you would have answers. With the permission of Mrs. X, I'm publishing her email.

You Want My Life?

I once wrote about "Those Wacky Civilians." It was a humorous post about the disconnect that sometimes occurs between us and them, and it was certainly not meant to denigrate civilians, but rather to point out the obvious - sometimes it's hard for them to understand the totality of this life we lead. After I published the post above, I received a huffy email from a civilian who threatened to sic the civilian police on me and take away my right to interact with the civilian community, or something like that. I tried to explain that my post was all in good fun, that I actually do love civilians and that my family and a large percentage of my friends are civilians, so I really needed to be able to interact with them. Okay, that's not exactly how I put it, but whatever I said must have resonated because the civilian constable never showed up on my doorstep and I retain my privileges to speak to civilians to this day.

We have poked a little fun at civilians here and here, and we've also praised them here and here. We love civilians, of course, but we need to laugh sometimes too...

Today, I'm going to praise a civilian who recently said something that left my jaw on the floor.

Through Her Eyes

I know I'm a day late and a dollar short, but I still wanted to point this out.  Andi did a great job of summing up Episode 10 of Army Wives, but I thought maybe all of us viewers could benefit from seeing this episode through the eyes of a spouse who's lived it.  Heidi wrote a post on her own blog about her thoughts on this episode:

I did not know if I would like the show. I do not consider myself an Army Wife or even an Army Widow but just me . . . actually I don't know what I consider myself. I do know that my 6+ years of living the Army way of life were some of the best years of my life [...]

So tonight I wanted to cry(happy) when Claudia Joy mentioned her wife (Hannah) was coming to town for a Rose Garden Memorial dedication. It was 'me' being introduced into the story line. As her story developed I could not help to think about my situation and the circumstances of Sean's death.

Click here to read the rest of Heidi's thoughts and to see this episode through her eyes.

Oh My Goodness! Oh My Goodness!

Every so often, I will end up in a dream situation and not be quite sure how it came about.  More than once, the tipping point putting me in that situation has been that I am a military spouse.

Tomorrow night, at 9 pm on SpouseBUZZ Radio, I will have one of those dream situations.  I will be interviewing one of my favorite political thriller authors about his latest book and about the current state of the Global War on Terror. 

Let's give it up for Brad Thor!  Seriously, follow me after the jump.  I'll give you some info on this amazing guy and his books, what a military wife with a deployed husband was doing reading political thrillers, and I'll throw in a picture of him for good measure.  For no other reason, you should click over and check out his picture.  Seriously.

I Hope You've Found What You're Searching For

I recently looked at the various Internet searches (Google, AOL, Yahoo, Feedburner, etc.) that result in people landing at SpouseBUZZ. Some of them are funny, some are sad, and some are just, well, you'll see....

So, I thought I would offer some commentary on a few of the searches because I'm unmotivated at the moment (even though I have 100 other things I should be doing), I have a twisted sense of humor and occasionally it's fun to make mountains out of molehills. So, here goes:

Anniversary gift

My husband's aunt and uncle had an anniversary earlier this month.  They received a card from their son.  What made this card precious to them is their son was in Afghanistan - his fourth deployment!  Who knew a card could mean so much?

I swear, I have ADD. Seriously.

I cannot focus on anything to save my life. I was telling my mother-in-law the other day that I'm amazed that I was able to shave both legs in the shower the other day without getting distracted.

I put my cell phone in the fridge the other day. Took me 1/2 an hour to find the darned thing. I had gone to grab some water and I guess I had it in my hand and set it down on the shelf without realizing it.

Did you know?

Included in this week's <