Did you know?
July 31, 2007|
Included in this week's Military Report:
« June 2007 | Main | August 2007 »
Role reversal
July 30, 2007|
After reading GBear's post about going home and wondering how her husband kept up with the "household" duties while she was away for 3 months, I was reminded of some of the things my husband and I have learned about each other over the years when one of us is unable to "fulfill our duties" around the house.
More to the point: I learned that my brain can multitask and his can not. And, he has a really hard time dealing with the fact that he can not help when he feels he should be (i.e. when he was recovering from being wounded in Iraq).
The Absentee Auntie/Sister/Friend
July 30, 2007|
I have become used to friends and family members who go through periods of not speaking to us.
Usually, it is because we miss a lot of holidays and milestone events, although I must admit that my big mouth and lack of a seven second speech delay do their own good bit of damage. But most often, it is because we just cannot get "back home" when we need to.
Like weddings. This August, we're missing a big one.
Deployment Embarrassments
July 29, 2007|
Warning: Some adult content....
One of my least favorite things to deal with during a deployment is when something major breaks. Something that requires a maintenance man to come fix it. It's always a hassle for anyone when something breaks, but for women, when a strange man comes to your house while your husband is deployed, it can be uncomfortable. Uncomfortable for me, because I either lie through my teeth, or manage to embarrass myself royally. And I do mean, "royally."
Reintegration
July 28, 2007|
It's been more than three months since I left home to be a 'non-military medical attendant' for my son in MN while he goes through limb lengthening! Lengthening done, external fixator off - we are preparing to go home this week!
I think I'm having reintegration issues!
Shamefully Hanging My Head in the Corner
July 28, 2007|
I know this is going to open me up to all sorts of finger shaking, tut-tutting, and Creative Memories CARE packages, but I have a confession to make.
Until this morning, I had not put a picture in a photo album since 2003.
Therapeutic
July 27, 2007|
Most of the contributers here at SpouseBuzz, had blogs before writing here in a support forum.
Some of us were blogging as a means of expression, or keeping the events of the day, (no matter how mundane) in a sort of historical perspective for our families, others started blogging as a way to keep in touch with those far away.
After meeting most of my fellow contributors, and other bloggers. I have yet to meet anyone that regrets using writing as an outlet.
Rain, sleet, snow, or shine
July 27, 2007|
Andi wrote about all the exciting new animals you see moving around the world with the military. I think many people experience the same shock at all the weather they get to endure. So let's open up the same idea for the weather; come on, tell us about the first time you saw snow or a Korean monsoon or humidity.
Countdown...
July 26, 2007|
My question for this post is, "How do you count down the time while your spouse/significant other is away?"
My life has been a series of semesters for the past 4 years. I have been in grad school since August of 2003. I have found that my "time gauge" for DH's return from wherever is based on semesters (or mid-terms, finals, etc.).
New Duty Stations Mean New Experiences. That, or They Just Reveal That I'm a Weirdo
July 26, 2007|
I am not a military brat. I was born and raised in the same area. Until I met and married my husband, the only surroundings I was intimately familiar with were same the ones I had experienced, over and over again, for twenty years. It was all I knew. Aside from the annual vacations and occasional trips out of state, I didn't think that much about the differences in surroundings.
All of that changed when I married a soldier.
NMFA Government and You E-News for the week of July 24, 2007
July 26, 2007|
Topics in this Week's News Include:
1. TRICARE Beneficiary Personal Information at Risk
2. Free Financial Planning for Injured Service Members
3. NFL Players Extend Free SAT Prep Program
4. Wounded Warriors Commission to Hold Last Public Meeting
5. USAA Tops the List of Military Spouse Friendly Workplaces
You Mean Have Lunch...Together...at a Restaurant?
July 25, 2007|
One of the great things about a PCS move is that usually our spouses have several days when they arrive at their new duty station before they have to report for duty. Of course, most of that time is spent getting settled into a new home and acquainting the family with the new surroundings, both on and off-post.
Why do they even make those checklists?
July 24, 2007|
My previous post was about waiting in limbo to see if we get to take leave or not. Regular SpouseBUZZ commenter dizzylizzie reminds us all that it's never safe to plan anything in the military more than a month ahead. She's right, but my husband's course ends tomorrow, and we still don't know if he's getting leave or not! We may or may not be on a 17-hour car trip by the end of the week. How I wish we had a month to plan.
Our family seems to have a history of waiting in limbo. For our very first PCS, we didn't get orders until six days before he signed out of his unit. And that was to Germany; it's not easy to arrange an OCONUS PCS in six days! On our way to our current duty station, we cleared our previous housing, loaded the dog and suitcases in the car, and swung back by post to pick up my husband's orders. Yep, he got his PCS orders on the way out of town.
This made me think about those PCS checklists you get: 12 weeks out, do X; 9 weeks out, do Y, 6 weeks out, do Z. Has anyone really ever been able to follow that checklist? Twelve weeks out seems like a dream to me; so far we've been lucky to have one week for everything!
Who created those checklists, and can I please have their Army lifestyle?
Voting is open
July 24, 2007|
I posted previously about Kmart's 'Best Military Homecoming Kiss or Hug Contest' and several of you wrote to me to say that you had entered.
The voting has now opened and there are many super photos to choose from. They will warm your heart and some may even bring tears to your eyes.
Visit here and vote by placing a Hershey Kiss icon next to your favorite photo. The winning photo will be announced on August 20, 2007!
The Spouse Role Outside Tradition
July 24, 2007|
I'm a klutz. I have had life-long dreams of being one of those graceful and gracious ladies who is always dressed impeccably and says the right thing at the right time in the perfect tone of voice. Basically, I've got dreams of being Andi when I grow up.
But, alas, it doesn't seem to be in the cards for me. If there are stairs, I fall down them. If there is a conversation, I'm one of the loudest participants. If there is a serious discussion I'll be the first one to bring up sex or poop. Inadvertently, of course. And that is not even getting into that whole situation where I was visiting the White House with the back of my skirt split, completely oblivious to the fact that everyone had a full view of my control-top knickers.
Re: Milspouse Memorial
July 24, 2007|
In the comment section of GBear's post about a possible Milspouse Memorial, someone mentioned that Ted Demianczyk of Military Spouse Magazine designed the proposed monument, which is being referred to as "The Two Faces of Courage." Click here to watch a brief video about the monument.
I think it's a great idea. Think of all the spouses who have come before us, as well as our generation and those yet to come. I believe all military spouses deserve some recognition for their service to our nation and a national monument is a nice way to honor them. We are a nation that pays tribute to our heroes through permanent memorials, and there's no reason military spouses should be exempt from that tradition. As for the issue of cost, the funding will come from private donations.
More information (and more video) available here.
Expanding Our Reach
July 23, 2007|
When we first launched SpouseBUZZ Talk Radio, we had a crappy time-slot - 6:00 p.m. EDT. Immediately, we received complaints from many of you because at 6:00, some of you were on your way home from work, making dinner for your children, etc. and were unable to participate in the live show. Our radio program has "proven its mettle" so to speak, and we're now able to schedule shows in primetime. Beginning next week, our new time slot will be...
Army Wives: Episode Eight Discussion Thread
July 23, 2007|
Another episode down and once again, some real-life situations were adequately addressed on last night's show.
I had to laugh when Pamela was struggling to feed her children. She's out of milk for cereal and goes for the easy fix, Little Debbie brownies.
Dad said to eat a healthy breakfast.
Yeah well, dad isn't here right now.
This scene reminded me of Homefront Six's excellent Deployment Confessions post. As we all know, deployment and good nutrition don't always go together...
Milspouse Memorial
July 20, 2007|
Just thought I'd pass on that we Military Spouses might get some monumental recognition. Can't help but wonder what the statue would look like?!?!?! How would we look when memorialized?
Getting Back on Track
July 20, 2007|
I've just completed a PCS move, so I have a lot to write about, but the thing I'm currently struggling with is how to get back on track. I'm a pretty regimented person and I usually operate on a strict schedule. I wake-up at 7:00 a.m., eat my breakfast and get to work. I break for lunch between 12:00 and 12:30, squeeze in my Yoga Booty Ballet between 2:00 and 3:00, shower and get back to work. Dinner is between 6:30 - 7:00. Well, you get the idea.
A PCS move throws everything out of whack.
Talking the (Complaining) Talk
July 19, 2007|
I find myself having to warn many people about my speech mannerisms when I first meet them. The explanation is getting so long and detailed at this point, that I may just take to typing up a contract for new acquaintances to sign before we get into any discussions.
"Okay, initial here at the cursing section. Now initial next to the whining waiver. Oh, wait - you almost forgot the b**chy moments notice..."
It's nice to know I'm not the only one, however.
Army Wives: Episode 6 & 7 Discussion Thread
July 19, 2007|
Our radio show featuring a discussion about Army Wives with one our favorite stars from the series starts soon! We need to hash out the two most recent episodes, don't we?
Who's with me?
When will I learn?
July 18, 2007|
Oh Army, you keep telling me not to trust you, but I never seem to listen.
My story is not nearly as bad as moving because your husband's deploying and then finding out he's not deploying yet, but today I also find myself in one of those situations where I'm banging my head against the wall wondering why I ever believed anything the Army said.
Army Wives Cast Members on SpouseBUZZ Talk Radio
July 18, 2007|
Update: If you missed the show, click here to listen to our conversation with Wendy Davis. It was a fascinating interview. Click here to review a list of our previous shows.
Original post as follows:
Join us tomorrow at 6:00 p.m. EDT on SpouseBUZZ Talk Radio. We'll devote the full hour to the television series, Army Wives. We will be joined by Wendy Davis, who plays LTC Joan Burton. If all works out, we'll also be joined by another cast member.
You can join the show live and talk to Wendy by dialing 646.478.5665. You can also join us in the Yahoo IM chat room and submit questions for Wendy.
Click here to listen live tomorrow evening at 6:00 EDT.
See our weekly discussion threads where we dissect and discuss each episode of Army Wives after they air:
Army Wives: Episode One Discussion Thread
Army Wives: Episode Two Discussion Thread
Army Wives: Episode Three Discussion Thread
Army Wives: Episode Four Discussion Thread
Army Wives: Episode Five Discussion Thread
Did you know?
July 17, 2007|
Included in this week's Military Report:
Family Heartaches Unnoticed
July 16, 2007|
Many of our military families often endure such painful experiences. They do so with very little money and sometimes no support system. I don't know what's to be done for many, but I wanted to give a voice to one person who contacted me and see what y'all came up with for advice, commiseration and 'been-there-did-this" words of wisdom!
The following is an email I received, I didn't change anything except to remove her name and contact information. I'm sure you'll find many things to agree with, many things to disagree with, many things to applaud, many to infuriate.....we all deal with what we are faced with in the best way we know how. It's the words of a mil spouse reaching out from her own experience. Your wealth of experience would be appreciated!
The other LIST
July 15, 2007|
It seems as if every military spouse I know makes a list. A list of things she, or he would like to do before the deployed or absent spouse returns.
Things like:
Paint the living room
Learn a foreign language
Lose 10 pounds
Exercise more
Read more
Finish a degree
Learn to knit
Clean out the garage
Organize closets
Pay of some debt
Sadly, very little of my "wish list" got done, as I had 2 small peoples in the house, and was nursing one of them. I never seemed to find the time to read more than baby care books. And I got very few projects done. Even sleep was elusive.
And then, there is The Other List.
Memorial for Mom
July 14, 2007|
My friend, Karen, wrote me to tell me of her mom's death due to cancer last week. I went a bit numb with shock. It's always hard to hear of the death of someone you know a friend loved dearly and you can't help but want to put your arms around that friend and hold them close. Unfortunately, military friends can't always do that.
Karen's mom loved her dearly and Karen reciprocated those strong emotions. They were very close. Karen has been fortunate in her current assignment to be close to her mom. Got me thinking about how tough this is on military spouses - separation from family of origin.
40 Minutes Till Go-Time
July 13, 2007|
I just received word that all four members of Drowning Pool will be joining us at 3:00 EDT on SpouseBUZZ Talk Radio. We'll have the full compliment. Hooah....
As an Army wife, I greatly appreciate celebrities using their celebrity to support our troops and I'm looking forward to thanking Drowning Pool for traveling to dangerous regions to entertain my husband, and yours. If you want to thank this band for their support of your spouse, you can do so by calling into the show, or using the Yahoo IM group.
airforcewife will co-host today's show with me.
In Case You Missed It...
July 13, 2007|
Last night on SpouseBUZZ Talk Radio, AWTM and Guard Wife discussed what I think is one of the toughest issues facing military families - reintegration. You can click the play button below to listen to the show.
Great news. We're now able to host shows in primetime and will soon be moving our shows to 9:00 p.m. EDT, which will allow more of you to join us live and talk with our guests.
Don't forget to join us at 3:00 EDT this afternoon for an interview with the band Drowning Pool. Details here.
Drowning Pool and SpouseBUZZ Set to Bang Heads Tomorrow
July 12, 2007|
What do heavy metal and SpouseBUZZ Talk Radio have in common? More than you might think.
The heavy-metal band Drowning Pool has performed live for troops in Iraq, Kuwait and South Korea as part of a USO tour. As a result of their trip to Baghdad, they were inspired to "make a difference" for our troops and have started a campaign called, "This is for the Soldiers," which is designed to give veterans returning from Iraq and Afghanistan better mental health care. Below is a video of the song "This is for the Soldiers" that Drowning Pool wrote for our troops, it features footage shot in Iraq.
Members of Drowning Pool will be joining us tomorrow afternoon at 3:00 EDT on SpouseBUZZ Talk Radio for a live interview. The band is currently on tour, and were gracious in accepting our request for an interview. In order to accommodate their grueling schedule, we booked them for a rather unconventional time slot. Tomorrow, they will be discussing their involvement with the USO, the "This is for the Soldiers" campaign and their deep respect for the military.
As always, you can join the conversation and speak to Drowning Pool live by dialing 646.478.5665, or you can submit questions during the show via the SpouseBUZZ Yahoo chat room.
Click here to listen live tomorrow at 3:00 EDT. Let the headbanging begin...
Was it a Hostile Takeover?
July 12, 2007|
My beloved husband has some very military quirks in his dress habits. For instance, the man will not leave the house without a t-shirt under his shirt. I am not kidding when I reveal that he has been known to wear under-shirts under t-shirts. And belts - unless he is clad in workout shorts, the man will twitch and itch until he finds a belt to wear with his pants or shorts.
I tried to tell him last night that it wouldn't kill him to leave the house without a belt, and the look he gave me would have melted Arctic ice caps.
In any case, since I was used to his under-shirt peccadillo's after many years and countless drawers filled with white, tan, and black t-shirts, I didn't notice that hubby's t-shirts were being infiltrated by something new and stealthy.
Under Armour.
Do you want to use a "Lifeline"?
July 11, 2007|
Several of my friends in our unit chose to move back to the mainland for the duration of the deployment. Slowly, they are returning to the island. One of my good friends is back this week and is moving stuff out of her storage unit into her new home. She is a capable woman - former military herself and no stranger to hand tools and such. Nor am I.
Given that our husbands - our technical advisors - are in a war zone, we can't just call them when we need help with something. So we call each other. Our lives are like the MilSpouse version of "Who Wants to be a Millionaire".
You gotta have friends...
July 11, 2007|
My husband is my best friend. I delight in his company, seek his opinion, trust his counsel, and, at times, marvel at his patience.
That said, women need women friends too. It's not that Lancelot isn't good about helping me buy a Birthday Ball dress. As a matter of fact, I've never been Ball gown shopping with anyone but him.
It's just that female friends fill another need, answer another call and understand things in a way only women can.
Reunion and Reintegration on SpouseBuzz Talk Radio
July 10, 2007|
I am one of those wives that has had anxiety around reunion, and I have also had trouble with reintegration.
I have also been lucky enough to note, (thanks to SpouseBuzz)I am not ALONE here.
Did you know?
July 10, 2007|
Included in this week's Military Report:
Itchin' to Go
July 9, 2007|
In last night's episode of Army Wives, Trevor tears his ACL. He comes out of the doctor's office on crutches and tells his wife that his injuries are serious enough that he won't be deploying with his unit in a few days. And the scene was played absolutely perfectly: Roxy gets a huge smile and thinks it's great news, and Trevor's face falls as he hobbles away.
Now this was a moment I could relate to!
Beg, Grovel - I need your help!
July 9, 2007|
I'm writing a post to beg, grovel and plea for help! As most of you know, I am founder of an organization called "Sew Much Comfort". We provide adaptive clothing for the wounded troops returning from Iraq and Afghanistan. This clothing allows the troops to get dressed soon after their injury, provides them with more comfort and dignity than the ever-so-unpleasant alternative (hospital gown!) and lets them know, with every stitch, that America supports them!
The clothing we've created up til now has been geared solely for their hospital rehabilitation. But, we've had requests recently from troops returning to active duty who need to have their uniforms adapted to accommodate injuries and prosthetics. This is where it gets sticky!!!!!
D'OH!!!
July 7, 2007|
Okay, so you move to a new residence. Be it base housing, a rental or you bought it, the residence is "yours" for a time. You hang your curtains, put your pictures on the wall and do some gardening. You put your personal stamp on it. You celebrate holidays and make memories here. You make it your own.
And then it happens. The mother of all buzzkills.
Tell me, what can you do?
July 7, 2007|
I am not handy around the house. My Father was quite handy when I was growing up. And he made sure to teach me how to change a tire, and check oil in the car. Beyond that, I really never had much interest in "fixing things". I sort of regret that now. I can do basic things. I have been known to repair the garbage disposal on ocassion, I can hang curtain rods, and fix a leaky faucet.
However with DH's frequent absences in the past five years, I have learned a few tricks.
"Where have you been?"
July 6, 2007|
"Where have you been?" I asked myself today as I was getting caught up on SpouseBUZZ posts. My answer to myself: "I have no idea! What day is it anyway?"
Now, I don't normally have these types of conversations with myself on a daily basis. But when hubby is gone and I am functioning on "auto-pilot" I do tend to find I am "lost" somewhere among my daily life. My kids can always seem to find me - which is good (right? The never-ending "Mooooooommmmmmyyyyyyy!") Okay, so that gets old after day one, but what are ya gonna do?!
Housing
July 6, 2007|
We previously discussed Privatized Housing back in January. This is a continuous hot topic, so let's do some follow up.
Please Allow Me to Introduce Myself
July 5, 2007|
Before I became SemperFi wife, I was an Air Force brat. I have moved 19 times and lived in 5 foreign countries: Canada, Spain, Germany, Turkey and Egypt. Alas, I am only fluent in Canadian.
I was born in Abilene, Texas and have no memory of the place. We moved 5 weeks after I was born.
My first word was a profanity and I used it in an appropriate manner. I am left handed and I have a Leap year birthday. Next year, I will be 11!! Yayyy!!!
I met my wonderful husband, Lancelot, at a toga party.......
4th of July
July 4, 2007|
I just wanted to take a minute to wish all SpouseBUZZers a happy Independence Day, especially all of you whose spouses are far away today. You are in our thoughts and we are grateful.
Family Readiness Group regulations
July 4, 2007|
I was fortunate enough to attend a town hall meeting with the Acting Secretary of the Army, Mr. Pete Geren, earlier this week. He spent the majority of his time asking for and answering questions and taking suggestions from the audience which was comprised mainly of family members.
One of the most well-received suggestions (well-received by the audience, that is) was the suggestion to relax the Family Readiness Group regulations with specific regard to fund raising. In the past 5 to 10 years, the Army has tightened the regulations pertaining to Family Readiness Groups and fund raising by FRGs in particular. While some regulation tightening was warranted, some of the regulations have been TOO restrictive.
For those of you who have been involved in Family Readiness Groups, what are your experiences with Army regulations as they relate to Family Readiness Groups and fund raising within them? Post them in the comments!
I'll have another post in a little while with my thoughts on this as well as how revisiting and re-evaluating the regulations might lead to stronger public involvement and support of local military support groups.
Homefront support
July 3, 2007|
We've all heard the statement that homefront support for the troops is waining. Many organizations that were gung ho to support the troops have had to close their doors due to lack of financial support. However, I've personally felt the magnanimous nature of the American people in Sew Much Comfort.
So many others have as well. We've all been touched in so many ways by the generosity of the everyday civilians who want to make a real impact. Recently the NMFA Newsletter shared such a story. I thought I'd share it with you! As the 4th of July rolls around and the country gives thanks to the military - I'd like to thanks those thousands of civilians who support and love our troops as well!
Welcome Semper Fi Wife
July 3, 2007|
Please join me in welcoming Semper Fi Wife to the cast of SpouseBUZZ authors. As the name indicates, Semper Fi Wife is the wife of a Marine, and we're thrilled to have some Marine representation around these parts.
Semper Fi Wife is witty, funny and has a heart the size of Texas. I'll let her introduce herself, but for now, I just wanted to welcome her to SpouseBUZZ and let you know that we have a new author. Semper Fi Wife informs me that despite their reputation, Marines are really quite civilized. I was disappointed to hear that...
Army Wives: Episode Five Discussion Thread
July 2, 2007|
Wow, a lot was packed into last night's episode of Army Wives. Where to start?