D'OH!!!

Okay, so you move to a new residence.  Be it base housing, a rental or you bought it, the residence is "yours" for a time.  You hang your curtains, put your pictures on the wall and do some gardening.  You put your personal stamp on it.  You celebrate holidays and make memories here.  You make it your own.

And then it happens.  The mother of all buzzkills.

In the back of your mind, you know it's coming.  You're a military spouse.  You KNOW it's coming.
The minute you find our you're moving.  Again.

The time from when you know to when you actually move can be quite short.Sometimes though....you find out a full year in advance.

And then what do you do?

Do you keep purchasing houseplants? 

Do you put up any more pictures on the walls or do you stop because that's just one more hole you'll have to patch later?

Do you start purging the junk drawers in anticipation or do you procrastinate, move them and then deal with all those little treasures?

Do you stop making new friends because that means one more person you'll have to say goodbye to after the moving truck pulls away?

Have you prematurely started the moving process?

I know that people deal with moves in different ways.  I am one of those people who will stop putting up on the walls because that IS one more hole I'm going to have to patch.I am one of those people who will stop buying plants (indoor and outdoor) because I know I can't take them with me. And although I would never give a new neighbor the cold shoulder, I know that I don't put myself out there as I would if there wasn't a move in my immediate future.

Let's face it, moving is a logistical process but it's also an emotional one.

What are your ways of dealing with a move?

Comments

[Andi]

Um, well, let's just say that this move crept up on me. Instead of dealing with preparations for the move, we went on vacation! That's one way to deal with it - stick your head in the sand.... Ha!

[wiese]

moved here in March and planning to leave in November (originally it was suppose to be August.) My garage is filled and my house is now minimal. I'm not missing anything. I have to meet friends because I need to have play dates for the ten year old. I'm amazed how open people are to new friends even though I say I might be leaving soon. I started a neighborhood watch program because I'm scared when my husband's away, even for a short time. I'm aware their is no pattern for me. Each move will look different because my priorities will change. I do plan on leaving each place better than I found it.

[Sly2017]

"What are your ways of dealing with a move?"

Well, (sound of ripping tape) I'd love to answer that, *grunt* (cardboard box being scooted across bare floor) but ((fingers caught between box and wall) **pack!** I'm kinda (dance around while sucking on bleeding finger) I'm **pack!** kinda busy.....

"Pack" is a four letter word....the worst one in the cussin' dictionary, if ya ask me....

[Semper Fi Wife]

LOL Andi...I've done that before too...

Wiese, I put up a link in comments at my intro post for you about home security, etc.
Good on you for starting that neighborhood watch group too!!

[Semper Fi Wife]

Hang in, Sly...it's almost over.

And then you get to un-p#$k.

[Jan Wesner]

I've lived in my house since October, but still haven't unpacked and have no pictures on the wall. The irony of it is we'll probably be here 4-5 years. And this is the first house we've ever bought, the first one that's really our own and we can do anything we want with.
http://blogs.tampabay.com/standingby/

[Sly2017]

"And then you get to un-p#$k."

No one likes you very much....

>;~}

[MO]

I maybe wont put any more pictures on the wall and I stopped buying houseplants years ago and now just garden outdoors. :(

As for buying curtains and stuff, I still would, because, hey, you'll need them where you're goin'.

Something fun I like to do is maybe buy new sheets, dishes, etc. and not open it until I get to my home. You know something you were planning to replace anyway. So that way you throw out the old (or donate) and have something to look forward to at your new place. Maybe I'm just weird... LOL.

[Semper Fi Wife]

Jan,
We bought this house in 2002, lived in it for 18 months, rented it out for two years when we moved to Pendleton and moved back in two years ago.

At first, I was kind of like you..used to white or neutral walls and usnure what I wanted to do.
Then, I went wild with the colors..my family room is a mango color and my kitchen is a medium dark green.

MO, I like that idea of buying something new and opening it on the other end!! We will know in August if we're going to be moving next summer (which is kind of why I wrote the post).

Sly...you loves me and you knows it...

[Sarah]

We've lived 5 places in our 5 years, and none of the moves were a surprise; everywhere I went, I knew I'd leave in about 6 months. Didn't motivate me to do much in the apartments. Our last 6-monther, I actually left half of our stuff in boxes hidden in closets; no sense in getting out Christmas decorations or the second set of dishes. Now that we're at this duty station for (supposedly) five years, I am having a hard time letting go of the Moving Mentality. I have already begun whittling down closets and getting rid of old textbooks...and we still have over four years here! My mind has been conditioned to always think about the next move.

[Kel]

honestly.. I do not know.. we have only moved once and that was to Campbell.. we have been here for almsot 4 years and still no PCS in sight.. .. I do not know how I will act.

[Linda]

I do what I have to do. Start getting rid of things not needed, hold yard sales, etc.

You need to read my "award winning" story of my PCS to Germany. We packed up in April 05. Waited for 7 1/2 weeks for housing (hubs was there, we were bouncing between families). We arrived mid-June, 05. The beginning of July, they announced that our division was returning to the states - THE FOLLOWING JULY. Our HHG didn't arrive until end of September of 05, due to SNAFU's at our previous post.

The LAST thing I wanted to do was unpack ANYTHING because I KNEW we would be packing it back up in 6 months. But I did anyway - and I hung pictures and curtains, and made it a home for six months. Then packed it all away again. Because it's what we do as military wives - adapt and overcome - and drive on.

[USMC SSGT Wife]

We go room to room and get rid of ANYTHING we haven't used since the last move, give it, trade it, sell it, donate it!!! Old toys, clothes, extra furniture, yard equipment...especially if we're on a base there's ALWAYS someone that needs a little bit of everything. And then of course the Dreaded PACKING.... after the kids are tucked in bed,with a glass of wine and some great music!! Great time to talk and discuss what's to come at the next duty!

[Wiese]

The computer is always in tow. It's as important as my moisturizer.

[Jewel]

Wiese...that's funny and so TRUE!!! We also make sure to take our own tool kit along with all the screws, pins, etc that go with all our antique furniture so we can re-hang doors, mirrors and shelves just as soon as possible. Goes a long way to making our new house feel like home.

[Brenda Frantz]

YES, yes...the hole in your heart for a stable, normal life is what tears you down. Please contact me personally on frantzbrenda@yahoo.com, I am a old army wife with plenty and I mean plenty of tips for you. Much understanding, Brenda

[Wiese]

I thought of one more thing. I use what I have. The bottle of Lavendar bath and shower gel is used until it's gone. No longer do I wait for some special night to smell sweet.

[k]

Oh I'm jealous! I don't have any moving stories to share=( My father was stationed here long ago and always had unaccompanied tours. Then I got married and thought hmmm...maybe!?!

We've been here 7 years already and no orders in sight. Dang stabilization & life-cycles! Guess I can't complain too much though, we are at a good duty station and family is close. But I would like to experience living somewhere else someday.

[Shanna]

Well, we just got here about 6 weeks ago and will probably be here for 4 years, but I'm already trying to figure out where in the world I'm gonna dump more household weight. We only had about 100 pounds to spare with this one and we didn't bring couches, dining room tables or beds for the 2 youngest. Ugh! Guess we'll have to declare more pro-gear! That or my DH needs to hurry up and make a couple of ranks!

[Kathy]

Are there are any resources with checklists or binders with categories for PCS moves, especially overseas?

I know I could make my own, but why re-invent the wheel?

Any websites or other resource tips with tools to use would be great.

Thanks for having this community!

[Kathy]

I found one. I suspect there are more out there like this.

Thanks!

http://www.lemoore.navy.mil/naslosg/pp/movingchk.html

[SemperFi Wife]

Kathy,
That's really a great site and breaks things down so nicely.

I'll be on the lookout for more things like that. I agree with you..why re-invent the wheel?
Thanks!

[Kathy]

Not sure if anyone else is checking this posting, but I found the customizable 'Plan Your PCS' move from the DOD. It looks even more comprehensive and easy to use.

http://www.militaryhomefront.dod.mil/portal/page/itc/MHF/MHF_HOME_1?section_id=20.40.500.400.0.0.0.0.0